Gone Gone Gone Crazy

Hey all yes I have completely gone crazy or at least that is how I'm feeling. I do not really wish to do anything because every little thing just sets me off inside and I am sure that I should not express myself at this time because it could be bad for my health and everyone else's. I get SO frustrated and I am not even sure why I am frustrated. Talk about confusing to my self!!! I wish I had a space i could go and just lock myself away and be completely alone with no worries and no one telling me to come out of my shell. Cuz damn it i wish to be in a shell. Hell it is the only place I can not get to. Yeah today is valentine's big whoop. We have no money to do anything for each other so it has turned out to be another day on the calender. My good friend Erin finally got her ring from her old man....about time. I am very excited for her that is if I could feel excited but I really feel nothing. I think that is bad when you feel nothing. Good thing no one passed away that I know because I would not feel anything anyway. That must sound horrible but it's how I am right now. oh well it's part of being me Bi Polar and fucked up. I wish I could work inside my mind to change whatever it is that causes this shitty feeling, cuz I would gladly give it to someone else or at least stop it from happening to me.